Fulfill Your Dreams

Fulfill Your Dreams
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Monday, December 27, 2010

Making the New Year's Resolutions Work

According to usa.gov, these are some New Year’s resolutions that are popular year after year:

Drink Less Alcohol
Get a Better Education
Get a Better Job
Get Fit
Lose Weight
Manage Debt
Manage Stress
Quit Smoking Now
Save Money
Take a Trip
Volunteer to Help Others


When thinking about your New Year’s resolutions from past years, do any of these sound familiar? They certainly do to me! Topping my list, almost every year, has been losing weight. Each year I begin with high hopes and by the end of that year, I’m sadly disappointed, wondering where all that January 1st willpower went. Have you ever felt that way? Good, then I’m not the only one! Seriously, I think we’ve all felt that way, those of us who have made resolutions and haven’t kept them.




It’s so easy to resolve to be become better and often difficult to follow through. This year, I’ve assessed my own situation. And I believe I’ve found a solution. Now, time will tell. When 2011 comes to a close, I’ll know for sure if this works. In the meantime, I’ll share with you my thoughts on why my New Year’s resolutions haven’t always worked and what I’m doing differently this year to make them a reality.




Let’s take the weight loss thing. It’s a pretty popular resolution, probably because over 66% of Americans are overweight. We’re all in this together, whether you have 5lbs or 50 you’d like to drop. Let’s just say, I’m somewhere in between (and I wish it was only the 5)!




In years past, I’ve listed my #1 resolution as losing weight, generally followed by how much weight I’ve wanted to lose. Period. The problem is, I never put down anything specific. I never created a game plan. Sure, I had an idea of what I’d do. A few years ago, I quit drinking sodas, cut out a lot of sugar that way, especially since I’d been a Mt. Dew junkie. Had one every morning, every afternoon and sometimes more in the evenings. It wasn’t easy to give up, but I did it. The thing is, it didn’t help me lose weight. I knew it had helped others lose weight. So why didn’t it help me? Because I overcompensated…with sweet tea. Yeah, I’m from the South and we love our Southern Sweet Tea. It’s practically a delicacy. So while I gave up one sugary drink, I replaced it with another. No game plan. No success.




This year, I’m putting weight loss on my list again, along with the amount I want to lose. But I’m not stopping there. I’m going to list several specific ways I plan to lose the weight and get fit and not replace one bad thing with another. Now, your specifics may be different from mine, but this is what my game plan looks like:
· Work out 3 times a week
· Eat smaller portions (box up ½ of each meal when I eat out, share it with a friend or order less- no super-sizing)
· Take the stairs (stop using the elevator, not just some days but every day)




In the next few days, I’m going to go a step further, to really get specific. For instance, I’m going to mark the days on my calendar when I’ll be working out; schedule them just as if they were appointments with important clients.




I truly believe that being more specific will help me in keeping my New Year’s resolutions. And it doesn’t have to be about weight loss. It can be about anything that you want to change in your life this year. Make 2011 your year to make a difference in YOUR life. When you become a better YOU, you become a better (fill in the blank) for them, your clients, your family, the recipients of your volunteer work, your employer.




Another thing I’m changing is this. I’m not making a list of 10 resolutions. I know myself and that’s way too many to keep! Instead, I’m making my list easier to control. I’m cutting it down to 3. So, in addition to being more specific, I’m intending for success by making my resolutions more manageable.




My #2 resolution is to finish a book I’ve begun writing. Now, last year I had every intention of completing it by the end of 2010. That’s not happening. Why? Probably because I let little things get in the way of my writing time. Now, could I have finished it? Sure. It was definitely do-able. But I didn’t have specific times blocked off on my calendar; I didn’t set small goals in order to reach completion. Now, I’ve set dates when each chapter should be completed rather than when the entire book should be complete. And if you’d like to keep up with my progress, visit http://www.shehasabigbut.com/. Yes, an odd name, for sure. But once you read on the site what the book is all about, you’ll see it fits pretty well.




My third resolution is to work on my speaking skills. As a speaker, I realize how important it is to not only get lots of stage time but to continue learning from others and putting what I learn into practice. The last thing I want to do is bore my audience! (And that’s the last thing they want me to do, too)! I’ve blocked off time on my calendar to learn from others and to participate in my local Toastmasters group; the only way I can be better is to have good feedback and the best way to get it is from Toastmasters who have learned the art of giving valuable evaluations.




Now, if you’ve been like me, a little disappointed at the end of the year when you realize you haven’t kept your resolutions, I encourage you to do two things:



1) Be specific; give ways you can reach your goals and make those ways do-able. (You noticed I’m not giving up my sweet tea. Sure, I could put that on the list, but giving it up completely is not going to happen).



2) Keep your resolution list manageable; pick only a few things to work on.



If you and I do this, I truly believe, when we come down to the end of 2011, we won’t have to wonder where all that January 1st willpower went. Instead, we’ll have reason to celebrate because you and I will have kept the resolutions we set, every single one.




Wishing you the best in your 2011 success,
Jean



http://www.jeanbaileyrobor.com/

Friday, December 24, 2010

Merry Christmas!

As you go through this holiday season, take time to enjoy those special moments, those moments with family and friends. Take comfort in knowing your gifts of friendship and love are long-lasting and make the greatest impact. I don't remember much about the gifts I've received over the years as much as I appreciated them. But I do remember the happy times, the joys shared with loved ones. And, at Christmastime, that has made all the difference.


While there may be moments when you feel sadness, maybe memories of a loved one no longer with you bring a tear to your eye, know that this Christmas brings great potential for happiness, and you have the power to make that happen. Over the years, I’ve found several ways that help take my loneliness out of Christmas and today, I’ll share 3 of them as my Christmas gift to you.


  1. Feed your soul- Use the time you may have away from work and other activities to feed your soul. So often I find myself neglecting the spiritual part of me. (Not to mention the physical part, but that’s a whole nuther story)! We have so many resources at the ready to provide encouragement, healing, uplifting of our souls. Reading a scripture, singing or listening to soothing music, spending some quiet time in meditation and prayer. These are ways that I’ve found rejuvenate me and feed my soul. Sometimes, and this is really fun, putting on some upbeat Christmas music while I bake Christmas goodies does the trick. Now, does this keep me from feeling sad? Not completely. Often a Christmas song will evoke a precious memory, but there’s joy within the sadness, and the memories are sweet.

  2. Give to others- There is so much joy in giving to others. Whether you provide a monetary gift to the less fortunate or donate food, toys or clothes, you’ll receive a blessing. And, you know, sometimes if the recipient of our gifts aren’t all they appear to be, it makes us feel bad. If that happens, know that you gave for the right reasons and bask in that knowledge. And know that, because you gave, you’ll be blessed. Helping others at Christmas and all year through is really what it’s all about and, when you give, that echoes the gift of God’s son, Jesus, whom we celebrate. He truly is the reason for the season. Celebrate Him by giving to others.

  3. Host your own party- If you find that you’ll be alone on Christmas (and you’d prefer to enjoy the company of others), don’t wait for an invitation, host a party. Several years ago, I began inviting friends, family & neighbors over on Christmas evening for hors d'oeuvres and a time of fellowship. Nothing fancy. Nothing that took a lot of preparation. (Of course, it did force me to clean the house)! Some years there are few that show and it’s a cozy and intimate time. Some years there are many and a more party-like atmosphere. Every year, it’s a time of happiness and joy. Now, it’s become one of my Christmas traditions. And one that I, and others, thoroughly enjoy. All because I didn’t want to feel lonely at Christmas.

    So, if you find yourself feeling less than joyful this Christmas season, I hope that what I’ve found to help me will help you as well. After all, Christmas only comes once a year; enjoy the joy of Christmas! Bask in it!

Merry Christmas!


Jean

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Friday, November 19, 2010

Of Celebrating Life

This week I celebrated another birthday. It was great! Lots of birthday wishes to brighten my day. However, when the day first began, I started to wonder where it would lead. Here’s what happened: I woke up to the sound of the television I’d left on the night before. Nothing unusual there, except there was a commercial on and, in my bleary-eyed state (you know, that place almost between waking and sleeping) I heard how I should invest in plastic surgery to eliminate those dreaded signs of aging. How could I live with those little lines and sagging chin; it was just…inexcusable. Of course, I couldn’t put the world through that, having to look at my unaltered face each and every day.

Oh yes, just what I wanted to think about on this day!

I dragged myself out of bed (I’m not a morning person) and into the bathroom. After a shower and some positive thoughts I felt ready to face the day. Still, that little commercial nagged at me. Eliminate the signs of aging, huh? No, not for me. I looked in the mirror, thinking ‘I can live with this.’ Still, was it a sign?

I began putting on my war paint. Ladies, you know what I’m talking about. The stuff that enhances our natural beauty (or covers up a multitude of flaws). I’ll leave it to your imagination which way that works for me! As I began applying all the stuff, I noticed I was using anti-aging foundation (thank you, L’Oreal), Revitalift Eye Cream and Olay Regenerist ‘spackling’- at least that’s what I call that stuff that fills in all the little lines you notice but probably no one else does. (Especially if you have one of those mirrors that magnifies every little thing! Whoever invented that, I just want to know ‘What were you thinking?’) Did I really need another reminder I was getting older?

Mentally, I waived the thought of growing older and decided, instead, I would focus on life itself, being thankful for every day, finding reasons to celebrate the day. By the time I left home, I had conquered the negative feelings and was beginning to feel pretty good about myself and my life. I had so many things to be thankful for: family, good friends, more good than bad experiences. Life was good!

I hopped in the car, ready to face the day, determined to find and experience joy at every turn. And speaking of turns, just as I turned on the radio, I heard a familiar song: ‘It’s the End of the World As We Know It…’

Really?

Was this a sign?

Then I smiled. This was going to be an interesting day. And it was. And, as the day wound down, I found a voicemail with another song, the traditional ‘Happy Birthday’ sung by my grown kids in unison. Somehow the ones in the mountains had coordinated with the one at the coast so they could all be a part of making my day extra special.

It really doesn’t get much better than this.

And if I had a tear in my eye, I’ll never tell. But I will admit that it warmed my heart and gave me another reason to celebrate not a perfect, wrinkle-free life, but a life worth living.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

And there it was…

Christmas in all its glory, in November. No, there wasn’t snow on the ground; it wasn’t even cold enough for that, but that will come, probably well after Christmas, in January, if I’m lucky. But today, as I walked through the downtown area, Christmas was there. It wasn’t too flashy, not much glitz—yet—but the street lamps had been decorated, just today, and that was all it took for my thoughts to turn to all things Christmassy.

I thought back to last year. How thankful I was to have had all my adult children in the house at the same time. I hoped it would work out that way this year as well. It seems harder to arrange now that they live so far away. Even so, whatever time and whenever I see them will be fine…and wonderful!

Walking down the sidewalk with the street lamps adorned with greenery makes me feel like I’ve gone back in time. Sure, they’re electric street lamps but they have that old-time look and feel. The atmosphere, with the cool crisp air, compels me to dream of holly days.

And dreaming of Christmas gives me a reason to celebrate life. Not all Christmases have been happy times, but dwelling on the ones that have, and dreaming of the ones that will, is good for the soul. I can’t help but smile, thinking of all those goodies I’m going to make, how the house will smell, how it will sound with the hum of friends and family sharing together, and the glow of the Christmas tree.

And there it is….another reason to celebrate life, and it all started with the trimming of a street lamp and the advent of the spirit of Christmas in my heart. I hope you’ve found a reason to celebrate life today. If not, look around you, really look, and see if you can find what God has sent your way to realize that life can, and should, be celebrated!

Joyfully yours,
Jean

Friday, June 11, 2010

99 Years Ago Today

On this day in 1911 a great man was born. When I came to know him, he was a man of few words but great wisdom. He had a sweet smile that lit up my world. His twinkling blue eyes radiated the love he felt for others but didn’t often put into words.

In his younger days Dee drove a Model T. It wasn’t as easy as turning a key (or pushing a button) to start the car. There was a crank on the front and I remember him telling me that you had to hand crank it, and there was a trick to it. It was best to cup the crank in your palm because if you put your thumb under the handle and it ‘kicked back’ it might break your thumb. Once cranked, he’d run to jump in, especially if it was on an incline. How times have changed.

When I think of all the life he experienced, it humbles me. How can I complain when the house is too hot in the summer realizing that the house he grew up in was cooled only by soft summer breezes and some not so cool? And for years he drove a car that had no air conditioning, radio, even windows.

I remember one story that he told about his younger days. He and his brothers, Henry and Kin, were riding down a dirt road in that Model T. They’d found a pig on the side of the road and picked it up. They came to a check point and, worried they’d get trouble with the law, Kin quickly threw one of their suit coats and a hat on the pig. The officer came over to the car and asked each of them their names. The Bailey boys complied and, from the back seat, the pig squealed. As he walked off, dad overheard the officer tell his partner. “I’ve seen some interesting characters in my time but that Oink Bailey is the ugliest son-of-a-gun I’ve ever seen!” I never knew if that was a true story or very much embellished. Guess I never will. But it brought a smile to a lot of people and it gave Dee great pleasure in telling it.

June 11, 1911. I often wonder what that day was like when that baby boy came into the world. That boy that grew up to be a man who cared about others more than himself. Now, I don’t know what he was really like in his younger years, but I do know what he was like later in life. And I do know that he loved and cared for his family.

Thinking back to Dee’s funeral is almost a blur, but there are a few moments that, after these 14 years, still stand out to me. The pastor of his church and a former pastor spoke and spoke well of him. In both cases, they mentioned that they had been—many times over—the recipients of his generosity. He was famous for handing out $20 bills. Not only to them, but to others too as I soon learned. There were plenty of times, as a college kid, that I wouldn’t have had enough gas to get from home back to college if not for his $20. I had to smile. Funny that none of us had known he was giving to the others. That was so like him. Giving without making a big deal of it. Quiet generosity. Speaking with actions rather than words.

I’m thankful that certain parts of Dee live on in me. I’m thankful that while dad may not have left a fortune, he left a legacy, a legacy I’m still trying to live up to. Most of all I’m thankful for 1911.

That was a very good year.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Are You A Creature of Habit?

Yesterday, I was reminded that we are creatures of habit. What habits have you created? Do they serve you well or do you wish you’d never created them?

A few weeks ago there had been a flurry of roadwork going on in my hometown. (If you’re a Burlington resident, you know exactly what I mean)! Streets were being scraped to make way for new pavement. It was rough driving there for awhile until the new pavement was laid. Wow, what a difference it made, and I came to appreciate something I’d taken for granted all these years: good roadways.

Interestingly, at the intersection of Main and Maple, a traffic flow change had been made. For years, we had been driving up to the intersection with the right lane giving us the option of turning right or going straight; the left lane was for left turns only. Now, according to the signs and painted arrows, the right lane was for right turns only; if you wanted to go straight or turn left, you needed to be in the left lane.

So yesterday, as I stood at the corner waiting to cross, I noticed that 4 out of 6 cars drove straight through the intersection, in the wrong lane. One of them even did this as a car was driving straight through in the correct lane; fortunately, the driver, noticing his error, slowed and let the other go through before he continued down Main Street behind him. I cringed a bit inside, hoping they wouldn’t crash. As I shared this with a friend, she noted, “It’s only a matter of time before somebody crashes.”

That’s when I realized that we really are creatures of habit. No doubt these drivers, just like me, had been driving down Main Street for years in the old traffic pattern. Even with a sign several yards before the intersection that warned of the change, many (if not most) drivers were continuing to go the same route they’d been going.

Does that sound familiar? Are you a creature of habit? Have you been doing things, saying things, believing things simply because you’d done it, said it, believed it for years?

I challenge you to ask yourself, do these actions, words and beliefs serve you well? Or do you find yourself on a downward spiral, ready to ‘crash’ at any minute?

Because of a traffic pattern change, and my own tendency to swerve into the wrong lane, I’ve asked myself that same question. What am I doing, out of habit, that I should change? What am I saying that I should stop saying? What am I believing? And do those beliefs have a solid foundation or should they be changed?

Good or bad, we are creatures of habit. Let’s make sure that you—and I—follow our good habits and rid ourselves of the ones that drag us down before we find ourselves ‘crashing.’

Habitually yours,

Jean

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Your Perfect Day!

Have you spent your whole life waiting for your perfect day? Most of the time, I believe, what gets in our way of a perfect day is stress. Stressful situations can steal our joy in a heartbeat!

Today, I'll share with you 3 tips that I recently shared on Celebrate Life! the Internet radio show, to help you realize and experience YOUR perfect day.

I believe the worst gift we can give ourselves is to allow stress into our lives. Why? Because it’s such a negative force. Stress is not only emotional, which is bad enough, it also affects us physically. There’s a reason they’re called stress headaches! And that’s not all. According to WebMD many types of heart diseases such as heart attack and high blood pressure can be brought on by stress. It’s a nasty little culprit that you can’t afford to let into your life. Too much stress can ruin your perfect day before it even gets started.

There are many times when things happen that are less than pleasant or downright traumatic. This is life and, I don’t know about you, but I can’t control all my circumstances. But there is something I can control and that’s how I react to unpleasant situations that come my way. It’s not the circumstances, it’s the reaction that matters most. And for you, it’s your reaction that matters.

In order to de-stress your life and live your perfect day, you have to find something that works for you. These 3 tips are what works for me.

1)Breathe. Yep, it's that simple. When stressed, I find that I take shallow breaths. If I remind myself to breathe and breathe slowly and deeply, it has a calming effect. When you feel anxious, tell yourself: When stressed, take 3 deep breaths.

2)Expose your perfect day. Take a few moments to visualize your perfect day. Expose it to yourself, in your mind. Then, take it a step further: write it down; expose it on paper. Now, take it another step further: speak it out loud at least 5 times.

3)Move toward your perfect day. It's not enough to de-stress by breathing deeply, expose your day with visualization and repetition. You have to put some action to your intentions. Don't wait for your perfect day. Move toward it! Take action to make it happen. Start by controlling your reactions to any situation that comes your way. It's not the circumstances that matter most; it's your reaction to those circumstances that can make or break your perfect day.

As I mentioned before, this is what works for me. What works for you? If these techniques help you realize your perfect day (or even if they don't)feel free to write and let me know.

And if you want more information on how you can live your perfect day, listen to my radio show, Celebrate Life: Live Your Perfect Day!

Celebrate life!
Jean

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Invest in You!

There's no better time than now to invest in you!

Take a moment to assess who you are. Are there areas you'd like to improve? Let me tell you of a time when I chose to invest in me.

Six years ago. My self-confidence and self-esteem were sadly lacking. I had come through a rough time in my life and I knew I needed to do something. But I had no idea what I needed to do. My first step was to read some self-help books. Our local library has books on tape and CD so I was thrilled that I could listen to them during the day while at work.

One day, as I was listening to a book by Cheryl Richardson, she mentioned that she'd gained public speaking skills through a group called Toastmasters. I'd never heard of it, but I was intrigued. That evening I 'googled' Toastmasters and found a club right here in my hometown. And they had a meeting that night.

Six years later, the rest is history.

However, that's not the best part. The best part is that I had no idea what I was getting into. Really. All I knew was that the people in the Burlington club were the kind of people I wanted to hang out with. So I joined. Later I found that joining a Toastmasters club was the best investment I could make in me. I found a freedom as I gained public speaking skills, confidence and my self-esteem grew.

Before long, I began to enjoy interacting with people on a personal level. Then I began looking forward to each time I was scheduled to give a prepared speech. (Believe me, early on, I really dreaded it...and, boy, did it make my stomach ache)!

Now, I feel honored when someone asks me to speak to their group. I think back to where I was and see how far I've come. And I look forward to the future and what it holds. I can't wait to see where this 'road' will take me!

Find a way to invest in yourself today. You never know where it'll take you.

Enjoy the ride.

Jean

Contact me for more information on what Toastmasters can do for you or visit www.toastmasters.org.

A Promise of Hope

I bought wildflower seeds today for a dollar.

I was in the store, shopping for only a few items, toiletries. Flower seeds were not on my list. However, when I saw them in a box on the shelf, I felt compelled to buy them. To me, they weren't just dry seeds, but a promise of hope.

Several days ago, in my doctor's office, I found that I would need to have surgery in the near future. It wasn't totally unexpected as I'd been having some symptoms and knew something would have to be done. Still, thinking of it, gave me an opportunity to pause, consider the loose ends in my life, and figure out how much time I might have to put things in order since I'll probably be out of commission for awhile.

The next few days I found myself working at a frenzied pace, trying to get ahead both at work and at home, preparing. Today, a small thing, a box of flower seeds, helped me to slow down a bit. I realized that, although I was accomplishing much, I wasn't doing much to prepare my body, soul and spirit for what lay ahead.

Do you have something coming up in your life that you need to prepare for? Are there stressors headed your way? Take time today to plan for taking care of you, inside and out. When we have rest and relaxation and peace of mind, we can face challenges so much better. In the store, when I picked up the box, I noticed the picture showed a myriad of flowers in luminous colors.

I already know in which part of the yard I plan to plant them in a few weeks when the weather turns warm. I visualize their radiance gracing the lawn, their unique scents filling the air as I walk through them marveling at their brilliance.

The walk, good for the body.
The scene, good for the soul.
The serenity, good for the spirit.

What I do know is that the promise the wildflowers bring is a promise of hope.

I bought wildflower seeds today for a dollar.

To me, they were priceless.

Jean

The Best Laid Plans

What is it they say about the "best laid plans of mice and men"? And just who are 'they' anyway?

This past week I found myself in the North Carolina mountains. Even before Spring fully arrives, the scenery is still beautiful to this city girl's eyes. However, this wasn't a planned trip nor was it a spur-of-the-moment vacation. I found myself there because my son had been admitted to one of the local hospitals. Yes, the "best laid plans of mice and men often go awry."

As I drove the 4+ hours to get there, several cliches came to mind: 'When life gives you lemons, make lemonade', and 'Every cloud has a silver lining'. So, in addition to the concern I felt for my son, I knew he was getting the best of care, therefore, during my stay, I took a few moments to make some lemonade and search for silver linings.

My efforts paid off. Not the first day I arrived, but later in the week as I felt more confident in my son's recovery, I began to notice a nearby wonderful creation, the Blue Ridge. If you've never seen this range of mountains, they're aptly named as they really do give the impression of being various shades of blue against the sky when you view them from a distance. Driving up the Blue Ridge Parkway to get a closer look, I took a few short walks to find some peace among gurgling brooks, daffodils, and a view that would take your breath away. I breathed in the crisp morning air, refreshing both my body and soul. The moments that I took to rejuvenate myself that day were not only a gift to me but a gift to those around me. I could be a better person, a better friend, a better mom when I allowed myself to embrace the peace of nature's offering.

What can you do today to find peace for your soul? You may not need to travel to the mountains or the beach. You may want to simply step out into your own backyard, close your eyes, listen to the singing of the birds, feel the warmth of the sun, breathe in the clean air.

Whatever is happening in your life, now is the time to take a moment for you.

If you look close enough, you just might find that your cloud has a silver lining.

Jean

Rome Wasn't Built in a Day

This French proverb from the late 1100's admonishes us to be patient. Some things simply take time, such as our journey toward a better life than the one we're living today. Just like the building of the great city of Rome, it may take time, patience and effort to reach our goals.

What are your goals? One of mine—and, yes, there are many—is to be content with who I am. In order to do this, I need to first decide what kind of person I want to be, then assess how far away I am from that person. Next, just like in building a great city, I need to make plans, to take steps toward my goal. For me, that means assessing every area of my life: my physical self and my spiritual being. Then, once I've decided what areas are lacking, making a game plan and going from there.

What about you? How can you make a difference in your life? Do you want to be a better student, teacher, parent, businessperson? Or do you want to be a better 'you'?

I challenge you to make your game plan today.

A building foreman never instructed his builders to work from a plan in his head; he studied an architect's drawing first and then formulated a game plan to make it happen. Whatever you want yourself to be, you can make it happen.

Rome wasn't built in a day. Your goals may not be reached in a day. But with patience and careful planning, you can make a positive difference in your life.

Jean

Hard Times Won't Last Forever!

What a comfort in realizing the hard times won't last forever!

Whatever you may be experiencing, whatever you may be going through, know that this, too, shall pass.

Several weeks ago I had surgery. It wasn't that difficult for me. After all, the doctor did all the work and I was asleep during the process. The 'hard part' for me was the few weeks afterward, the recuperation.

However, I'm now almost 6 weeks out from surgery, and the pain and discomfort pale in comparison to what I'm experiencing today, this beautiful day.

Today I choose to live in this moment to the fullest: to enjoy the sun as it beams down, warm, upon my face; to savor the taste of the evening meal I'll prepare later; to cherish the attention my little dog, Maxie, gives and the feel of her soft fur as she naps beside me.

Today, I've come to appreciate that the hard times--for me and for you--don't (and won't) last forever.

Carpe diem!
Jean

What a Difference a Day Makes!

Beautiful. Just beautiful.

Today, March 2, 2009, I woke up to a glorious site: our neighborhood had been blanketed in 5 inches of snow. Living in the piedmont region of North Carolina, I don't have the privilege of enjoying sites like this every day, every month, or even every year. I can't tell you how many times I've felt a measure of disappointment when snow has been predicted and we've gotten only rain instead. Although I knew it was supposed to be this way (I had heard the weather reports and I had even seen the snow falling before going to bed last night), it was magical.

As I walked out into it, breathing in the crisp clean air and laughing as my dog gingerly stepped from the porch into a snowbank, my heart filled with the same joy and wonderment I'd felt as a child. Of course then my joy was two-fold: 1)Yippee, it snowed! 2) Yippee, no school!

My dog, Maxie, is a bit of a mutt. My mother refuses to think of her that way as she feels 'mutt' is a derogatory term; instead she calls her a 'designer dog'. (See a picture of Maxie on my website: www.jeanbaileyrobor.com). Whatever Maxie is, we do know that she has some terrier and Cocker Spaniel in her. But the best part of all is that she's so loveable! My daughter bought Maxie a coat, complete with a hood, with fur around the edges.

When the snow began falling, we realized the dog was more prepared for it than we were. None of us in the house had boots….we had not needed them in years; and I can't remember the last time I'd worn a heavy coat with a hood. Despite that, nothing could keep me from donning my heaviest jacket, strapping on my tennis shoes and walking through that myriad of beautiful glorious snowflakes.

What makes a positive difference in your day? Or rather, what do you allow to make a positive difference in your day? The snow outside gave me an opportunity to be glad or to be sad. I could have commiserated about the cold temperatures, the difficulty in driving, etc. Instead, I chose to be glad, to enjoy it, to admire the crystalline scenery.

As I sit at my desk, preparing for work, I'm grateful for these moments when my world is transformed into a wonderland and my heart is lifted in joy. By living 'in the moment', I've found pleasure and peace in something as simple as a change in the weather. While my joy may no longer be two-fold, I still feel that 'Yippee, it snowed!' excitement each time I look out the window.

Beautiful. Just beautiful.

I think I'll make a snow angel when I get home.

Jean

A Nod, A Smile and Other Warm Fuzzies

Doesn't it feel good when you lock eyes with someone on the street and they offer you a smile? For no reason at all, they smile, giving you an unearned gift, a gift without strings attached.

Think about that the next time you meet someone's gaze. Just smile. A simple smile from you might evoke a smile from them. Either way, it'll make you feel good because who can feel poorly while smiling? No one.

A slight nod of the head can evoke a warm feeling also. While not as inviting as a smile, a nod is an acknowledgement, a softer greeting, a communication between we humans as we journey through this life.

What are some other things, unexpected things, that make your step a little lighter and your smile a little brighter? How about a hug? No amount of money can buy anything as satisfying as the hug of a close friend. There's something so genuine, so giving when one human being wraps her arms snugly around a close friend and draws her in.

What about the first time you hear the words 'I love you' from that special someone? Such an experience can make the heart speed up.

These are several ways that we can get warm fuzzy feelings from others. Just as important is finding ways to provide warm fuzzies for others and ourselves. Taking care of ourselves enables us to take better care of others.

I have a friend who is very careful with what types of media and news she exposes herself to. She fills her mind with joyful, positive images and in doing so, affects a positive attitude.

What can you do today to enjoy or provoke that positive attitude or warm fuzzy?

Positively,
Jean

Out-of-Nowhere Blessings

Blessings come in all shapes and sizes and ways. And some of the best blessings are the unexpected ones, the ones that come out of nowhere.

Today I was unexpectedly blessed. I happened to be walking to a local Subway for lunch and passed an older gentleman on the street. His expression indicated he recognized me. I quickly scanned my memory but could not place him. Just as I was about to pass, he asked me if I attended a certain church in the area, which I do. As some churchgoers do, I regularly sit in the same section Sunday after Sunday. He does the same, just a few rows behind me.

On this day, he became a blessing to me. We chatted as we both walked to Subway, through the line, and—although I protested—he picked up the tab. I had planned to take my meal back to the office but somehow I found myself asking if he'd like to lunch with me. His face brightened up and we chose a nearby table.

Throughout the course of lunch, we talked about church, families, and blessings. He indicated how he had lived most of his life on a self-destructive course, but had now changed direction and found peace. He told of how some family relationships had been healed, of how he could now be a blessing to others.

As we went our separate ways, he mentioned how much he had enjoyed our impromptu lunch and that I had been a blessing to him.

Today, this gentleman was an unexpected blessing to me. His act of kindness reminded me, that I too, can be an unexpected, out-of-nowhere blessing to others.

And so can you!

Be blessed!
Jean

Coincidence?

What are coincidences, really? They are simply the 'stuff' that connects the events of our lives. Many times they are an 'ah-ha!' moment. Other times we think of a coincidence as a twist of fate, a fluke, an accident. I like to think of them as a Divine plan to boost my faith in Something (or Someone) greater than me.

According to Deepak Chopra, when you live your life with an appreciation of coincidences and their meanings, you connect with the underlying field of infinite possibilities. When some circumstance comes into our lives, we should express our gratitude and explore the meaning of it. Then, we should dig deeper and connect with, not what it means, but what it could mean if we allow the possibility of the impossible.

When I choose to be grateful for the coincidences in my life, I find that they are less disruptive. I have a peace about them and about my life's direction. I don't let coincidences lead me, but I allow them to open up another choice, maybe something that I haven't seen or realized was there.

That 'stuff' that connects the events of my life are the same kinds of experiences that happen in yours. The delay to leave home in the morning only to realize if you'd been 'on time' you would have ended up in an auto accident. The 'close call' when you cross the street and saw a car speeding through the crosswalk 'just in time.' That event you choose to attend at the last minute, only to meet a life-long friend there.

I challenge you to express gratitude next time a coincidence comes your way. You may find you're part of a Divine plan, something greater than you could imagine!

Coincidentally yours,
Jean

Live NOW!

How often do you find yourself just going through the motions day after day only to find that a month has passed, a year has passed, a decade has passed without you really living?

Today I encourage you to live now, live in this moment.

Often it takes a wake-up call to persuade us to live. It may be a financial disaster, a divorce, the death of a loved one. It may be a terminal diagnosis. Sometimes these, and other, circumstances propel us to really live, to pursue our dreams, to realize them.

Why wait? Today is a good day to begin living, really living.

The Bible says, 'This is the day the Lord hath made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." It's easy to really live when you're rejoicing or celebrating.

Celebrate life! See each day as what it is, a gift! Begin the day by breathing in the fresh air, watching the sun rise, listening to birds sing. Savor that first cup or coffee, using that time to reflect, to be thankful, to plan your day. Be purposeful in your thoughts, in your intentions. Dream big and dream often. The glass isn't just half full, it's overflowing!

Each of us only lives once. Let's make this day, now, the best day it can be.

Really live it.

Live NOW!

Living life,
Jean

Let's Go Outside!

Remember how exciting it was when you were a youngster and someone would say, "Let's go outside!" It was a real treat.

Playing outside was so much more fun than being inside the house all day. Imaginations ran wild as stick horses turned into stallions, bicycles became motorcycles, and porches were miraculously transformed into army headquarters.

Outside! It was a beautiful thing.

Today the challenge is to go outside. Leave the computer, the television, the X-box, the Wii behind. Make a concerted effort to breathe in deeply the crisp clean air; feel it as it wafts across your skin; drink in the beauty of the world around you; close your eyes and listen, really listen to the sounds of nature. Those few moments, away from everything electronic (yes, leave that cell phone inside) will rejuvenate you and give you a sense of freedom from the stresses of life.

Your outside time should be pleasurable so no work allowed! Not unless, of course, you're raking up those leaves to take a flying leap into them!

Remember the joys of being outside. Relive those joys again.

Let's go outside!

Playfully yours,
Jean

Tell Them--You'll Make a Difference!

Is there someone in your life whom you admire? Perhaps a relative, a friend or a colleague?

Many times we go through life, noticing the good qualities of others yet failing to tell them. They may not realize that their kind word or gesture made a difference in our life or the lives of others. It's time to tell them! Giving praise where it's due is a good thing. It's a gift you can freely give. It won't cost you a dime but it offers a great return on the short amount of time you've invested. You'll be blessed!

Sometimes it seems that negative criticism comes easier than praise. Even so, that's no excuse to keep our positive thoughts to ourselves. Let the good things in your heart flow; let your words lift up someone else. What you say may be the only positive comment they hear today. Wow, that's pretty powerful!

Recently, a friend of mine did something for someone else that I felt was pretty awesome. It was an act of giving without expecting anything in return. It touched my heart in knowing this as I'm sure it touched the heart of the recipient of his gift. I sent a simple email, praising his generosity.

Take a moment. Can you think of someone who has touched your life or the life of someone else? Today is a good day to let them know. Not only will you be a blessing to them, but you'll find it makes you feel pretty good as well.

And it won't cost you a dime.

Is there something you admire about someone in your life? Tell them!

Admiringly yours,
Jean

Monday, April 26, 2010

Never Too Old to Learn

It amazes me how easy technology comes to the youngest of us. For instance, in the United States, there is a television commercial that features a four-year-old girl who is expertly using a computer program to make a picture of her fish Dorkie 'better' and email it to her family. Plus, I know of teenagers who send text messages from phones in their pockets, without ever looking at the keyboard. Then there are the wiz kids who spend hours writing computer programs. Today, my challenge is to put this blog on some RSS directories in order to create more exposure.

Simple? Let's just say, maybe I should have called the wiz kids to help! Still, I did have a couple of responses on my Facebook page when I posed the question about RSS feeds. (Thanks, guys)!

I decided to try my hand at it...with just one directory to start with. Hope I get this right. Time will tell.

Have you ever tried something for the first time and wondered, how in the world the younger generation found it so much easier? Still, I think as we grow older (and wiser!) we should never pass by those opportunites to learn, to grow, to expand our knowledge and skills.

What can you try today that you've never tried before? It may be something technical or not. What about learning to grow a better garden? Or learning how to knit a scarf? What about learning how to use MS Access? Or how to hang glide?

Many times we find that trying new things is exhiliarating. At the least, we'll definitely have a sense of accomplishment. I challenge you, today, to try something new, to spread your wings. After all, you're never too old to learn.

Jean

Blessings in Disguise

I remember as I was growing up my mom used to use the phrase, 'blessing in disguise'. She was referring to those circumstances that we often find ourselves in that, at first, feel like a negative situation, but end up as a positive. Have you ever had a blessing in disguise?

Just this week, I had my very first ear infection. Let me just say, for those of you who have never experienced this, it certainly didn't feel like a blessing. However, it prompted me to slow down, take care of myself a bit, and pull away from the rat race for a short time. A blessing of self-care in disguise.

Another instance happened a few years ago. My son could no longer afford the private university he was attending unless he became very deep in debt. He weighed his options and began looking for alternatives. He wisely chose to enroll in a state-sponsored school. Two years later, at college, he met the woman he'll marry next year, with a lot less college load debt than he would have had. Their love for each other proves to me that this was another blessing in disguise.

This prompts me to question those (seemingly) bad things that come into my life. If I'm late going out the door and, on my way, see that there's been an accident on the highway, I often wonder…if I had been on time, would I have been involved in that accident? I've had instances where I did not get a position I applied for and years later the company has closed its doors. For me, that may have been a blessing in disguise.

As life goes on, I intend for positive circumstances. I embrace changes and look closely for the good that can come from those less-than-perfect circumstances I do find myself in. How do you see your circumstances? Could they simply be blessings in disguise?

Many blessings,
Jean

A Little Me-Time is a Good Thing!

How often do you find yourself doing so much for others that you seldom have time for yourself? Life often demands that we're stretched beyond our limits; however, if we schedule in a little me-time, we do ourselves and those around us a big favor. After all, who enjoys being stressed out or being around stressed out people?

Lately, I've been stretched to the limit. Life has demanded a lot of time and energy, meeting deadlines and dealing with a family member's illness. Today, I realized that I needed a little me-time to rejuvenate. If you're a busy person, you're probably due for a little me-time yourself.

What is 'me-time'? It can be a variety of things. Maybe it's taking time to walk through the park, alone or with a good friend. Maybe it's sitting in a local restaurant (as I'm doing right now), writing, putting your thoughts down. Maybe it's being alone in the house, playing piano. Maybe it's taking time for a nice massage, mani or pedi. Or, your preferred me-time could be taking the time to read a favorite book.

Just now, why not jot down a few ideas of what your me-time of choice might be? (Go ahead; I'll wait).

Now, pick one and, if necessary, put it on your calendar for next week. Treat that appointment as if it were as important as any other activity you've scheduled. And, most importantly, follow through.

A word of advice: Don't let anyone, even your own little voice, accuse you of being selfish. This is your time to revive, to rejuvenate, to better yourself so that you may serve others (and yourself) more productively.

A little me-time….it's a good thing.

Refreshingly yours,
Jean