Let's Talk Toastmasters!

The first time I heard the word Toastmasters, I thought…..toast…..what? I’d never heard of Toastmasters International. And I lived in a town where a Toastmasters club had been around longer than I had! Sometimes the best things are the best kept secrets. Today, I want to let you in on this secret, which really isn’t a secret at all. Toastmasters International is an organization that helps its members develop and hone their leadership and communication skills.

First, let me take you back, over ten years ago, to where I was when I first darkened the door of my local Toastmasters club. I was in a really tough place in my life. A few years prior, my family had been torn apart by divorce. If you’ve ever been there and done that, you know what I’m talking about. It was a huge life-changing event that almost destroyed me. You can just imagine where my confidence and self esteem were after that. Yep, in the crapper. Can I say that here? That’s exactly where I was….lower than I’d ever been, with an emotional pain that manifested itself physically every single day. Finally, I became numb and was just going through the motions to move forward, keep my job and try to hold it together when my children were around. I was failing miserably.

After a few years of this, (yes, I said 'years') I happened to be sitting at my desk one day, in my little gray cubicle, listening to a book on CD. It was written by a life coach, CherylRichardson, who casually mentioned she’d learned to speak in public through Toastmasters. This gal wasn’t just any life coach. She was well known in her field and, later on, I’d see her on Oprah. But she’d planted a seed, sparked my interest, when she mentioned Toastmasters.

And I’d thought: Toast…what? I did what I often do when I hear about something new to me. I googled it. Found out there was a club meeting right here in my hometown that evening. I knew I had to be there, to check it out, to see what Cheryl was talking about.

Now, I wasn’t interested in public speaking. No way! I could hardly look someone in the eye when speaking one on one. And to give a presentation at work? Hey, if they’d asked me to do that, I probably would have found another job. (Seriously.)

So, I showed up at the club meeting, slinked into the back row of seats, and experienced my first taste of Toastmasters. I’d like to say that I saw the value of the Toastmasters educational program and signed up that night. For me, that wasn’t the case. Remember, I was in a very emotionally painful place. What I found that night was what I needed. 

And, I don’t know what you believe. But I believe, for me, it was a God-thing. Here’s why. I saw people with positive attitudes. I saw people that were rooting for each other to succeed. These Toastmasters, they applauded everything! (You Toastmasters out there are smiling right now, aren't you? Yeah, you know it's true.) The atmosphere made me feel good and the people were friendly.

I didn’t join that night. I went home and thought about it for a week. Because that’s just who I am. The next Monday night I showed up with a check in hand. I was in! (Shout out to Burlington Toastmasters!)

No one in my club knew why I joined. They didn’t know where I was in my life. All they knew was that I was a new member and they were determined to make me feel welcome and get me involved.

In that very first meeting, I’d seen a man give a really good speech. I’d told him I enjoyed it after the meeting. He told me something I’ll never forget. He said when he first visited the club, he’d sat in the back row just like I had. He said his fear of public speaking had been so great that he couldn’t even  stand up and introduce himself. Gosh, even I could do that! Probably not very well, but I stumbled through it. I was totally blown away by this guy’s confession. I’d just seen him get up in front of a group of people and give a good speech, without any apparent nervousness. Wow! So, during the week, from the time I visited to the time I joined, I thought about him. I thought of how far he’d come just by joining Toastmasters. And I decided if it could do that for him……then what could it do for me? I needed to find out.

Toastmasters was a part of what it took to get me from the broken place I was in, to where I am now. Did it cure my pain? No, it’s not about that. What it did was give me tools to make my life better, no matter where I chose to take it. The educational program helped me develop skills that affected my personal and professional life in a postitive way. I could communicate one on one more easily. I could speak up in meetings instead of being shut down by my own fear. And finally, and surprisingly, I found a real love for speaking  in public, something I never would have considered before Toastmasters or even as a new member. But I found a love for it because I saw how people can help other people best from the stage. You can inspire, motivate, teach and train so many people at once! And I knew that’s what I wanted to do.

Without my Toastmasters experience, I would have missed out on so much over the past ten years.

Life is so much better now, y'all. 

This is my personal take on Toastmasters. You can read my story in the book “Heart of aToastmaster” by Sheryl Roush. It's full of stories of people just like me, who found the benefit of Toastmasters for them.

To see where I am now, visit my website www.jeanbaileyrobor.com. Or look me up on SpeakerMatch.  Toastmasters has helped me stop putting limiting beliefs on me. And it’s helped me heal from some pretty deep wounds.

So, what’s in it for you? Are you ready to find out? Why not visit a meeting and see? Visit Toastmasters.org and find a club meeting near you. You might find more than one. Visit them all and see what’s the best fit.

Who knows? Maybe a year or two from now you’ll look back and see how your life is better because you took the initiative to invest in you through Toastmasters. And, if you do, let me know. 

Rock on, 

Jean

Jean Bailey Robor is that “No Buts About It” expert who simply wants you to lead happier, more successful lives. Getting past what’s holding you back and changing your mindset can put you on that path to better living. Click here to book Jean for your next event!

A Different Take on the Take-Down of the Go Daddy Puppy Super Bowl Ad

There it was. Out there for the world to see. The now infamous, but not so adorable, puppy commercial. If you haven’t seen it, click here now or read on. Called “Journey Home,” there was a little lost puppy that stole all our hearts. In fact, it looks a lot like my little furry friend did when I first took her in 15 years ago. In the clip, the puppy fell out of a pickup truck and became separated from his family. There were shots of him trying desperately to find his way home. Even though it was just a commercial, I found myself cheering this little puppy on, back into the arms of his owners and the familiar warmth of hearth and home.

And then it happened. In the comedy world, it’s called the twist. That line that takes you in a whole different direction and punches up the humor. In a movie, a comedy, it would have been hilarious. Told in a comedy club the bit would have been ridiculously funny. To use this bit to represent a company that should impart a certain customer service message to gain more business, it not only fell flat, it fell farther than flat.

Here’s why. As the puppy happily returns home, his owner is ecstatic, “Look, it’s Buddy! I’m so glad you made it home!” She scoops him up in her arms, holding him close. This is where our hearts are warmed to the nth degree. For pet owners, we know the joy of holding our precious pets close, and some of us know the joy of finding a pet that was lost, even if it just ran off for a short while (like my little Maxie did back in her younger days). Then, all the warm fuzzy feelings we have are immediately dashed as Buddy’s owner takes a tone that drips of greediness, “Because I just sold you on this website I built with Go Daddy.” Then, as the puppy is boxed up in a van, she says, “Ship ‘em out!”

Some said it was a spoof on the Budweiser “Lost Puppy” commercial which you can view here. Spoofs are better served on Saturday Night Live. The difference is, with the Budweiser “Lost Puppy” our hearts are warmed through and through till the end. It leaves us with that warm feeling and, even for folks like me who don’t drink beer, I have a good feeling towards the company that put it out there. Unlike the feeling I have at the end of “Journey Home.” It warms our hearts then turns them cold. And leaves some debating the ethical question of dog breeding.

I’m sure the writers intended to give us a laugh. Let’s face it, Go Daddy is known for creating commercials that are edgy. But, the viewers’ reactions beg the question: Is Go Daddy being served well by the commercials they’re creating? What kind of message does it send?

Here’s a few reactions from both (or all) sides of the fence:

     Michael G. says, “Someone thought this commercial was funny, but it backfired…I think it’s sick.”

     JuiceBoxing says, “Hey, the commercial was meant to be funny.”

     Ruth C. says, “Made me not want to use Go Daddy. Not cool!”

     Scott K. says, “Such an awesome ad. I can’t stop laughing.”

     Chrissy C. says, “I never seen a more horrible commercial ever.”

     Jeff H. says, “I’m so disappointed in Go Daddy, especially as one who volunteers and fosters for rescues.”

     Vicomi says, “#GoDaddyPuppy ad proves why understanding customers’ emotions is so important.”

I’ve been a customer of Go Daddy for years. You can view my Go Daddy website here. The customer service I’ve received over the years could not have been better. Whenever I’ve dealt with their techs, they’ve been super helpful. And Go Daddy provides a great service for both the novice and the expert in building websites. Plus, they are continually making their products and services better.

If I sound like a fan, I am. Do I think the company has poor judgment in commercials? Yes. And that’s my opinion. Just like the opinions you read above. Personally, I think it would be cool to see the commercial end with Buddy being welcomed home, just as he was, then show the website about the family's business (totally unrelated to dog breeding) and showing Buddy as the mascot.

 

Go Daddy’s CEO Blake Irving admitted, “We underestimated the emotional response.” It happens. Lesson learned. It will be interesting to see what Super Bowl ad the Go Daddy marketing team comes up with next. I don’t know about you, but I’m looking forward to it.

And this is my take on the take-down of the “Journey Home” Super Bowl commercial. What’s YOUR take? 

Jean

www.JeanBaileyRobor.com (Yep, that's my Go Daddy site)

Happy New Year: Selling Yourself....Every Day

In some of my talks, I share with my audience how we sell ourselves every day. Before you say, "Naaa, I don't do that," bear with me and see how, intentional or not, you sell yourself.

Now, I'm not talking about 'selling out' or participating in the 'world's oldest profession.' I'm talking about the perception others have of you due to how you:

1. Speak
2. Treat others
3. Present Yourself

Do you speak words of wisdom and kindness? Do you treat others according to the Golden Rule? Do you present yourself like a professional or give in to emotions / whims? (Okay, y'all, maybe I do act on a whim once in a while...)

People are watching, and once you realize that, it may cause you to live life differently. You and I have an influence, good or bad, on others. And, now that we realize this, we can choose to accept it in the following ways:

• Acknowledge the truth and resolve to live life better.
• Acknowledge the truth and decide you really don't care.
• Dismiss the truth and continue to live your life just the way you are. (Which may be a fine way to live...or not.)

I was talking with a friend recently. He shared that a speaker who, on the surface, really seems to have it all together, has tarnished her 'professional' reputation in the way she handles her personal life in public: drunkenness, flying off the handle, being manipulative and devious. This is more than enough to prevent me from inviting her to speak to any organization or share the stage with me. In business, it's more than important to be able to trust those with whom you trust the reputation of your business.

So, it goes in life. No matter what business you're in, people are watching who YOU are. You truly are selling an image of yourself every day, who you are. And it matters.

Today, I happened to read a blog post by Darren LaCroix. If you aren't on Darren's Stage Time newsletter email list, sign up now. You can thank me later. In this particularly post, "Stage Time: Bill Cosby, O.J., and You?" Darren shares that we have an opportunity to influence others around us by example. He says: People close to us are watching our actions more closely than the words they hear us say. (Click here to read the entire post.)

You're still here? Seriously, go read Darren's post. He says it all.

And remember, you really do sell yourself every single day. You don't have to be perfect. Just be you, the authentic you. And make sure you're selling who you want the world to see.

Imperfect but working on it,

Jean

Jean Bailey Robor is that “No Buts About It” speaker who simply wants you to lead happier, more successful lives. Getting past what’s holding you back and changing your mindset can put you on that path to better living. Click here to book Jean for your next event!

Why We Can't Call It "Christmas" Anymore

It seems that each year, more and more people jump on the bandwagon in the guise of political correctness to take away the freedom of speech the United States Constitution guarantees.  But it wasn’t always like this. Oh, yes, Virginia, there really IS a Christmas.

Once upon a time, in a galaxy far, far away…..no, actually, right here in our own backyard …. greeting someone in the month of December with “Merry Christmas” was not only acceptable, it was….get this…..not offensive.  Even folks who didn’t celebrate Christmas felt the warmth behind the greeting. There was nothing unpleasant, nothing derogatory, no ill intent construed.

So, how did we get from there to where we are now? And just within my short (short being debatable) lifetime?

According to an article on the www.law.cornell.edu website, when referring to freedom of expression protections within the First Amendment of the US Constitution, “the right to freedom of speech allows individuals to express themselves without interference or constraint by the government.”  The Supreme Court interprets the extent of the protection afforded to these rights.

Good men and women have fought and died for us to have these rights. Can you just imagine what they would think if they knew that we Americans were at odds over the words “Merry Christmas”? How trivial (and foolish?) it would seem that folks would get visibly angry by a warm greeting? Or, just as bad, that folks would get bent out of shape because someone wished them “Happy Holidays” in the same warm spirit? (Yes, it happens.) Who ARE these angry people? Obviously, this Christmas-Holiday thing is just a small part of what must be bigger issues.

I truly believe how we’ve arrived here, where “Merry Christmas” and “Happy Holiday” greetings are no longer embraced, has more to do with our evolving culture than the mere words, and meanings behind the words,  themselves. As a society, I believe we’ve:

• Embraced political correctness to such a polarized point that ‘tolerant’ has become ‘intolerant’
• Taught our children, by our own actions and lack of discipline, that disrespecting another human being is okay
• Missed the true meaning of what ‘being human’ is all about

And this, in my opinion, has led to why we can’t call it “Christmas” anymore. And yet, I also believe that we’ve been sold a bill of goods that EVERYONE believes this way, that EVERYONE could potentially become offended if we speak those dreaded words “Merry Christmas.” 

I believe we need to reinforce that it’s okay to be greeted by “Merry Christmas” or “Happy Holidays” without taking, or feeling we should take, offense. I also believe if we respond to a well meant “Happy Holidays” greeting with an angry and defiant “Merry Christmas,” we are only adding to the problem. Who declared THAT to be acceptable behavior?

Jim Krumel, editor of The Lima News, recently cited the following survey results in a blog post. When polled by the Pew Research Center about the phrase they most preferred to be greeted with among businesses, the majority of Americans responded that……(drum roll, please)……it didn’t matter.  (This is when “it doesn’t matter” was an option. When not an option, “Merry Christmas” was chosen  57% of the time.) Read Jim’s entire blog post here.

Posts and comments I’ve read recently include:

“I am not a Christian, but I don’t find it offensive when well-wishers offer me a Merry Christmas. I take it in the spirit it is intended.” – KitFox

“The way I look at it is if a Jewish friend offered Happy Channukah to me, and I were offended at that, wouldn’t that make me a jerk? Can’t we all, pardon the expression, just get along?” –Chris Behrens

Exactly.

In exercising my freedom of speech, I say “Merry Christmas” around here. Whatever you say, be it “Feliz Navidad,” “Happy Channukah,” “Happy Holidays,” “Seasons Greetings,” “Joyeux Noel,” “Happy Kwanzaa” or “Warm Wishes to You.”  In the spirit of the season, let’s just greet and be greeted and be merry.

Happy Festivus!

Err….I mean….Merry Christmas.

And I hope you took that in the warm spirit in which it was intended.

Jean

Jean Bailey Robor is that “No Buts About It” speaker who simply wants you to lead happier, more successful lives. Getting past what’s holding you back and changing your mindset can put you on that path to better living. 

#31DaysOfKindess It's On!

It all started when my friend World Champ Ryan Avery presented a challenge. For those of you who know me personally, you know, when there's a challenge like this, I just can't resist. And resist, I could not. 

Ryan said (or, if he'd been raised here in North Carolina, he would have said) "Hey, y'all, come join me in this #31DaysOfKindess challenge!" Actually, what he did was spur us on not only to rise up to the challenge, but to share what we were doing on social media using the hashtag #31DaysOfKindness. Obviously, this does two things: 1) It keeps us accountable and on task, 2) It keeps us connected with others participating in the challenge. Honestly, I have dearly loved searching on #31DaysOfKindness and finding out what others are doing. (As you can see, just from this Twitter feed, I'm lovin' it.)

It's been amazing what is happening in my own life. It's certainly proving the wise old words of the Bible true: It's more blessed to give than to receive. On Ryan's page, when he wrote 'Let's make a difference in the lives of thousands...' I wonder if he realized those 'thousands' he spoke of included us, the ones he challenged. 

For instance, on Day 1 we hand wrote  thank you letters. I couldn't tell you, prior to this, how long it has been since I wrote a handwritten letter. Before the days of email, I would write at least a letter (or more) a week. That just fell by the wayside once sending an email or text message became the norm. We share and receive information in real time or within seconds. Why even bother writing a letter where the recipient won't get it for a day or two? Here's the beauty of it. Keep sending the emails and texts, but when it comes to expressing something heartfelt, like gratitude, honor that person by sending a handwritten letter. It will make a difference. The cool thing is, the day after the challenge, a woman whom I greatly admire bought my lunch and shared some valuable business tips. You guessed it. I sent another handwritten thank you letter. 

I'd say this challenge is not going to last just 31 days. The joy we're bringing to others, whether buying a coffee, sharing an article, offering an apology, these are the things that are making a difference. And there's just no stopping the kindness in the human heart once it gets fired up. 

If you're a part of the challenge, watch out. After 31 days I have a feeling you'll see life, and the people in it, a little differently, and you'll be seeking out ways to be kind. 

If you're not part of the challenge, it's never too late to step in and be kind. 

For a look at what happened on the Day 8: Give a book to a friend challenge, take a look at the video I posted on my Facebook page. (And while you're there, friend me.) 

Let's do what we members of the human race do best, be kind. Anything less is not enough. 

Rock on, 

Jean 

As a motivational humorous speaker, Jean Bailey Robor is available for corporate, civic and faith-based events. Book her here. 

A Champion's Blog Post

Recently, I read a blog post by a World Champ. Now, that's not unusual. I believe if you have a dream, you need to follow those who have been there and done that. My dream is to become better at what I do: connecting with an audience. So, I listen and learn to those who have done and are doing just that.

One of those folks is World Champion of Public Speaking, Darren LaCroix. You may have heard of him. If not, stop reading now and click here to see his winning speech.

That speech won Darren the World Championship in 2001. Since then, he has dedicated himself to helping others become better speakers. I had the privilege of seeing him in person last year in Cincinnati, OH. It was standing room only. No surprise. He's THAT good.

Last month, Darren posted a blog that not only impressed me, it made me think. And that's the best kind of blog. Within a few minutes of reading it, I was challenged to further reveal my authentic self in my presentations, in my blogs, whenever I speak with people.

Today, I want to share Darren's life-changing blog with you. Click here to read it now.

I challenge you to think about that part of you that you need to share to connect with others, to become more authentic. Maybe it's time you, like Darren, shared your relationship with God.

Maybe it's time you begin that relationship.

Having a balanced life includes the spiritual. I truly believe that. I'm living proof as there have been times over the years when I've been close to God and other times when I wasn't so close. Wherever I've been, it's affected other areas of my life.

That's why reading Darren's God Blog had such an impact.

Be bold. Be brave. Be authentic.

Jean

Ready to book Jean for your next event? Click here now!

(This blog post was reprinted from The Champion's Connection Network blog by Jean Bailey Robor.)

Snapped! on Oxygen. Yeah, that's me.

"I just saw YOU on TV!" That's what she said and it was true. Me and my friends just happened to be in the right place at the right time. Scene from "Snapped!" Season 13, Episode 5. Click here to watch the mini-episode. (Warning: contains graphic images) We're on around minute 3. Not to worry. I didn't 'snap'! Even though my friend Randy now says, "I'm a bit scared to know you right now." Yeah, don't mess with this redhead, y'all, or I'll.....walk across the street."